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Making Your Ideal Life a Reality

by Brenda Wisniewski on 05/01/13

If you read my last post and imagined what your life might be like if you expressed your highest self, you might be wondering what to do from here. Let's talk about that. I've been told by many people over the years that I wear rose colored glasses.  Many people tell me that it's great to dream, but these dreams are not realistic, at least not right now. This type of thinking is what keeps us from taking the action we need to take in order to realize our lives fully self expressed. This way of looking at life is what I call a limiting belief or a story. It's what you tell yourself about what's possible in life. And, you believe it. You believe it so much that it keeps you from doing what your heart is yearning to do.

Imagine, just for one moment, letting go of this belief. I know this will be hard for some of you. It was for me. For many years, I bought into the belief that I had to work in a certain job in order to make the amount of money I needed in order to have the life I wanted to live. I would tell myself that once I have enough money saved then I'll build my coaching practice and do what I really want to do.

This is what I call the "when X then Y syndrome" that many people fall into. It's a trap. That day never comes or if it does you come up with another when X then Y scenario to strive for. You never end up doing what you want, because you're constantly living in the future waiting for something to happen first before you can be happy. Once I have that job, that pay check, that fancy car, the house, the man or woman of my dreams, the 2 kids and the picket fence then I'll be happy. You sit, waiting and waiting to find yourself at the end of your life wishing you just took a chance and did what you always wanted to do yet never did.

I ask you, what are you waiting for? What is your when X then Y scenario? Go ahead, don't be afraid to explore this - we all do this. It's common for us humans to be dissatisfied with the present, always wanting more, needing more, striving for more. I'm not suggesting that wanting is a bad thing - to want world peace is a beautiful thing. I'm merely asking you to think about what it is you want and why you're striving for it. Often times, when we stop and think about this, we realize we're chasing after things that really don't matter at the end of the day. So, what does matter to you? What matters to your heart? If you put that first and make that your goal what do you have to do differently? Anything? Nothing? Who do you need to be in order to live from this place? In order to express what matters most to you? What action do you need to take? Or perhaps you don't need to take any action at all. 

As you contemplate and reflect on these questions, you are beginning to open the door to the possibility of a new life. One that is fully self expressed. Congratulations, you're on your way.

Comments (2)

1. Sherri said on 5/3/13 - 09:17AM
Your post reminds me of the Serenity Prayer "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." What good does it do any of us getting bogged down in minutiae we can do nothing about? We CAN however always change our story, challenge our limiting beliefs and get out of the if this then that mental conundrum and create a new story that aligns us with what gets us fired up! We always have the resources at our disposal if we are open to receiving them. The other thing I think is that so many of us really have no clue what we truly want! I like how you say that perhaps we already have it if we just stop and still ourselves long enough to see it - that's what I plan to do this weekend, be still and take in all that is already available to me, the love and abundance that's right here for the taking.
2. Brenda said on 5/3/13 - 09:38AM
Sherri, thank you for sharing what you got out of this post. Beautiful reflection. I love the Serenity Prayer and that you will take the weekend to stop, be still and take in all that is already available to you. May you bathe in the abundance of beauty and perfection that is.

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